Manhood

 This was the Year 2000. It was the Millennium Year, the year that was going to change everybody's life for the better. Around This time, I began a relationship with a lovely lady called Marie. She lived five minutes away from me. After I had bumped into Marie a few times around Clayton, my next-door neighbour, who knew Marie, told me,'she fancies you'.

I was always fond of Marie and fancied her quite a bit. We ended up having a relationship for around four years: I would to and from her house. As you can see, I started to settle down with her, and a lot of people got jealous of this.People began to stir up trouble, accusing us of something we hadn't done, backstabbing us, and criticising our relationship.I was growing up and having to change my life quite a lot.You already know about the educational side of my transformation, now it was the 'transformation of manhood' because this was the year that was going to change everything.

While in a relationship with Marie, I used to work nights quite a lot so I would get home early in the morning, at around 6.30am. I would then sleep at Marie's house up until around noon. I wanted to prove to Marie that I was a hard worker and worked for everything I had. Working nights and studying through the day taught me a lot about my own capabilities.It allowed me to see what I could achieve if I put my mind to what I really wanted out of life. Marie came into our room one morning in July 1999 and said Frankie are you ok? I said 'Yes, why is everything ok?' She said 'Yes, but I have some good news to tell you. I'm pregnant.'  'Ok' was all I could say before going back to sleep uncharacteristically of me. I have never slept so long in all my life. I woke up at 4.00pm, wondering what I am going to do with my new life,? Wow I was shocked, but when the news eventually sank in, it hit me - Frankie Kington - A dad, then a broad smile lit up my face. I was gonna be a dad -yippeee!!!

I told  my friends and family the news, I was going to be a dad! - they were all happy for me, excited and thrilled! Then I realised 'I am not No one anymore'. The next nine months definitely challenged my manhood and made me grow up quickly.

Even though I knew my life would change, it was going to change for the better. I prepared like any father would knowing he is bringing a daughter or a son into the world. Life felt exhilarating and exciting because I knew my life was going to change again.. One thing I did know Marie's health wasn't a hundred percent, so I did my best to protect Marie's life the best I could, knowing she was carrying my baby.

During her early pregnancy, Marie had to go to the hospital several times to be checked out because her doctor was concerned. I spoke to my cousin Sharon about this and she warned me 'Marie isn't well, Frankie this isn't morning sickness'. At first I paid no attention to what was going on, its just morning sickness, I thought to myelf. Then Maries's condition was getting worse and worse and worse.About six months into the pregnancy, marie took ill.She was bleeding from the inside.Now I know this was serious.

Marie was called in urgently to North Manchester Hospital in Crumpsall. She was put onto a drip straight away, was quite gaunt looking and frail. I gave her all the support she needed for her life. I stayed at the Hospital when I needed to. I had a good conversation with  Marie's doctor. he told me 'We are going to have to operate on Marie or she is going to die with the baby.' Shock Shock Horror Horror, what was I going to do? Marie already had 2 children to 2 Fathers and I was responsible for looking after them. Plus I had to go to work so this event was very challenging at that time in my life.

After I heard Marie had to have a operation, I was feeling quite depressed and lost, quite sad and down. What I did know at this Time was I had a lot of Faith With my Christian Values, also, at that Time, my sister was a  Buddhist practitioner, so I knew her prayers would have a positive effect on my situation. I was quite anxious and feeling alone, I had to keep the faith though I knew this was quite challenging for me. One day I felt a sharp pain in my stomach just below my heart. I was struggling to breathe. Was I having a heart attack? Chantelle, Marie's daughter, called an  Ambulance which  took me to Ashton virtually  all night in a hospital bed.

Eventually the doctor saw me - I told him what was going on in my life, I told him about Marie my partner being in North Manchester Hospital with my baby and how ill they both were. The doctor told me it was anxiety and experienced a panic attack.. He gave me some medical advice, take some time off work and try to relax,breathing in and out slowly several times a day.what were we like? Me in Ashton Hospital, Marie in North Manchester with our baby, who were both not well at all. All I did know was that Marie was fighting for her life with Candice - there was still hope that Marie and our baby had a chance of  being alive and well in this world!

I started to see light at the end of the tunnel! Do you know they operated on Marie while Candice was still alive and the operation was a success. Marie had to have medical intervention for at least 2 years, but believe it or not my beautiful baby was still alive and kicking.

The doctors were amazed, they couldn't believe they both pulled through the operation. It was like a miracle, this showed the power of faith and the Human Spirit. The Doctor even shared this story in a Spanish Newspaper.Now that the whole family could breathe a sigh of relief with what had happened. I was even more excited. I was so proud of Marie and our baby. It felt like a massive victory that we had all won!

I honestly believe this event was really challenging my Manhood to see if I really wanted to become a father. Wow! Certain events play a major role in defining whether you are a real man ready to take on responsibility. After the operation Marie was getting bigger and bigger and I went down to the hospital to see the scan of my little warrior My, she was a fighter! I knew I wouldn't have to worry about her too much once she is in the World, she has her mother's fighting spirit.

So nine Months have flew by and now we were ready for the birth of our daughter. The doctor said they would call me when the birth was imminent, or she is ready to start labour. The taxi-driver, who I knew said he would get me there on time for the birth. He did as he said! He put his foot down and got me there in no time, ready for the birth. North Manchester Hospital here we come!

There was Marie ready to give birth or was she? Legs spread trying to push nothing happened at all. Marie started crying saying she was in too much pain due to her medical intervention through the operation.  Marie had to have a caesarean birth. At this point I was exhausted and started to cry 'What next, what next ? ' I thought, then the caesarean took place. Marie was holding my hand very tightly and here she was, out popped Candice Rose Kington! I couldn't believe it , she didn't even cry -Just staring at me with lovely big black eyes. I was thinking 'All that you have put me through for nine months and you're not even going to give me a tear'. I thought 'Wow, you are beautiful and a tough cookie'.

I cried tears of joy -  I was ecstatic! The day I changed into a proper man and now to experience Manhood.